Biologically.
Ok. It’s been a while since I last wrote here and it’s all just because nothing had happened. Now I have a couple things to tell though and that’s why I’m here again.
Firstly, I have become one year older again which, however, doesn’t feel different. It’s pretty funny how your birthday gets more worthless every year. As a kid I always thought the adults that didn’t celebrate their birthday were such lame and all, and now I’m about to be an adult myself. The birthday really is becoming just one day of the all 356. Still, there’s only one more year left before I’ll have my own driving licence! If only I learn to drive…
The hardest period is over when it comes to the school and nowadays I’m having almost as much free time as I have lessons. I have two late mornings and a couple of very short days. Like for example today, when I got home already at 12.00 am. How good it feels to take it easy in the last period of the first year in the high school! Summer’s coming and stuff. Ohh…
I’ve been thinking of dreaming. Sounds pretty funny, I mean, dreaming is kind of thinking anyways. I’ve still really been thinking especially of dreaming. What if your dream comes true after being your only way to escape the tough moments of your life for years? There’s no doubt you wouldn’t need to face any difficulties after the ex-dream world has become your real life. What do you have to dream about then? Not having problems? That’s impossible. So how will you manage at the time of the troubles not having your dream to escape in anymore?
This a problem I’ve been trying to solve and not yet succeeded. The thing is that I don’t consider myself as a Finnish person even though I 100% am. Biologically. But my mind’s not Finnish at all. Well, I love sitting in the backseat of a car driving hours without saying a word though. But otherwise. And I’m scared that if only I moved to Hungary that, oh God yes, is my dream world I wouldn’t have anything to help me through the hard times. I wouldn’t mind to break the lovely illusion of the dream world either but dreaming and living in another reality 24/7 takes a lot of my energy. Gosh! I’m so glad I’m still a young person having my whole life ahead. I’m just saying.
